I was in the checkout at Krogers this morning perusing, as I tend to do, the tabloid and women’s mag covers. I object to reading them, but the covers are fair game. How else can I know what Ben Affleck and Jerry Lewis are up to?
Anyway, for the seventy-fifth straight month in a row, some clever author has managed to come up with more secrets and tips about how women can drive their men wild in bed. I mean, there can’t be too much new, can there? There are only so many parts and so many permutations involving one man and one woman.
And I’m not one to engage in locker room talk, but not once, not a single time ever, have I ever heard a guy say something like, “Man, you won’t believe how the wife was in bed last night! She was like a tiger! She said she got some new ideas from one of those women’s magazines.” I have a feeling that there are no men who have ever said sometihng like that.
If it were possible that these articles actually had unique things to say about sex, and if these unique things actually made it into bedrooms and actually transformed peoples’ sex lives, marriage license applications would have subscription forms for Cosmo on the back. I’m just sayin’.
So why does it concern me so? Do I protest too much? Maybe, but I resent having to actively resist the myths and unrealistic expectations that our booty-obsessed culture has about sex. And I am growing ever more aware of issues about unrealistic expectations, misinformation, and body image issues as my daughter enters puberty. These are becoming real issues we’re gonna hafta deal with soon.
I also think that most Christian Churches’ approach to preaching about sex in society — a misguided strategy I call the “Primal NO!” — is all wrong, but that’s a whole ‘nother entry.