Welcome to Boring. I’m a native in these here parts — second generation Boring. I was born here and hope to retire here. I love Boring. I’d be happy to show you around.
So you’re from Drama, huh? I’ve vacationed there before. Yep. Did a week or two in Desperation a few years back. Spent a three day weekend in Despair too. All very exciting for sure, but I’m always glad to come back home. To Boring.
Storms of Life are exciting, yes. Boring is all calm seas and still winds. You can take off and land from Boring. To anywhere your heart desires.
The soil is fertile here in Boring. Good for growing things. You can grow children if that’s your crop of choice. Children thrive on Boring. But, without all the rocks and earthquakes of Drama, whatever roots you want to put down here will grow straight deep and strong.
Boring is the Heartland of everywhere you’ve ever been. But just because it’s the Heartland that doesn’t mean you can’t bring your mind. In fact, Boring gives you time to think, to use your mind. To write.
Granted writers in Drama produce better narratives, but here in Boring, we prefer a well-developed character.
That’s why I’m sure you’ll do well here.
Now there’s one rule all newcomers to Boring need to know — there’s a difference between being Boring and being Bored. Boring is a judgement others put on you, Bored is a judgement you put on yourself. You have control over the latter without having to leave the Boring city limits.
Well, there I go, talking too much again. I’ll leave you to get settled in. There’s a block party every week in Boring. Usually a pot luck. Your potato salad will be fine. Hope to see you there.