Book of Clark, Chapter 14: The Pie of the Lord

Somebody at work suggested “Pie-o-rama” for the next theme at our team meeting. (We’ve had “Dip-o-rama,” “Stick-o-rama,” and “Choc-o-rama” already.) That made me think about the Pie Of The Lord. I tried googling it and it didn’t come up. It was in 2003. So I’m reblogging just to resurface it to the search engine crawlers because such stories should remain as part of Clark tribal lore…

wellthereyougo

In the land of the Suburbanites, in the tribe of Clark, there was a High Priestess named Heidi who served God and ruled justly, slow to wrath and abounding in kindness. And in her reign the people were happy, for the land flowed with home cooking and every domestic goodness.

It was on the feast day of Saint Patrick that the Lord came to his priestess Heidi and said unto her: “Heidi, my good and faithful servant, you are chosen this day to do my work.” Heidi, though she was shaken with astonishment, replied, “Whatever you will, my Lord, I shall do.”

And the Lord spake unto her: “You shall bring forth a pie such as none in this land has seen, that my name be praised. There shall be a homemade crust, not store-bought as the law does permit, but made by your hand from scratch so that all…

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